taya-wolff's Diaryland Diary

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Dear MB

Dear MB,
I wish I hadn't gone to Austria. Before I left it seemed like we were so close, and growing closer. It felt like I could finally fully trust someone again, but I guess that's what I get for lying to myself.
I don't know, I've come back and we feel like where we started, possibly even worse. I'm not asking for the world, you know, then again- I'm not quite sure what I was asking for.
You used to give me shit for always turning to, waiting for and relying on MS. Can't you see why? You "underestimated" how much I missed you, just talking to you, MS never did. I don't know what you expected, but not what I am, evidentally. I never had to question whether she knew how much I missed her, or how much I cared. She always knew that I wanted to talk to her, and she always knew that I love having someone there, always. You don't understand that.
It sounded, when you gave her shit, like you wanted that, or at least like you wanted to understand. Now you understand it, are you better? There's no way I've ever cared as much for any other person as much as I have MS, but I always care about my close friends significantly... Apparently you don't realize this.
Or maybe you're just an ignorant, naive teenager that cannot comprehend what it really is to care about someone.
Sincerley,
Camille

3:51 pm - 07.03.05

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